The Envelope, Please

It's mid-March, and high school seniors will soon receive admission decisions from colleges. Regardless of what stage you are at in the college admissions process, this time might be bringing up anxiety. New test-takers just beginning the process observe their older classmates and empathize with the positions of their peers and wonder, "When the time comes, will I score well enough? Will I be good enough? Will I get in?" 

The word-of-choice when discussing college admissions is "acceptance." We want to receive the acceptance letter. We hope to be accepted to our dream school. And, when we aren't accepted, there's that other word: rejected. No wonder this is such a stressful process! 

The words we are using to describe it make my stomach knot up, and I received my admissions letter from Georgetown ten years ago! Accepted, rejected, accepted, rejected... Ugh. Enough is enough. Let's rebrand this, shall we?

The point of the college admissions process is not to determine your self-worth. {Tweet It!} 


The point isn't even to be "chosen." The point is to determine which school you will attend for your freshman year of college (and, hopefully, three years thereafter). As far as that goes, you only need one.

Now, it isn't the colleges that are giving us this specific vocabulary. Most letters from college admissions offices read something along the lines of "We are excited to offer you a spot in the Class of 20__" or "We are sorry that we cannot offer you a spot in the Class of 20__." The words "accepted" and "rejected" largely come from us, and they are rooted in the core human desire to be accepted by the people around us and those we hold in high esteem.

However, by using these words, we make the admissions decisions about our overall value rather than what it actually is: an indicator of where we might attend college next year (and, also, where we won't). At the end of the day, that's all that's going on. You're narrowing your options until you're left with the only one. And, there are so many smart, engaging people at so many schools that you have more opportunities to land somewhere wonderful than not.

When it comes to admissions tests, you have an opportunity to prepare and to show up with your best self on test day—and you should. This part of the process is in your control. You absolutely want to demonstrate to colleges your ability to succeed.

Once you reach this point of the year and you begin hearing from colleges, every college from which you hear "yes" is still an active option, and every college from which you hear a "no" isn't. That's it.

Then, it's your turn to choose—not only which college you will ultimately attend, but how you will handle the experience of attending. 

Take the opportunities you are given, and run with them. When it comes to your success in life, a lot more is riding on you and the person you are and the choices you make than the school you attend. And, if you've been reading my blog for any amount of time, you know where I stand on this matter.

 All of these learning experiences: high school, admissions tests, college, and beyond, are to teach you how to be your best self. When you're at your best, the world around you will begin to reflect it. That's when life gets really good.


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