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Four Limiting Thoughts That Stop You from Making Progress... And What to Do About Them

9/13/2017

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Last post, we talked about facing the fear of a new school year, and I set up a basic framework for processing anxiety around challenging situations. Step Three, “Make a Game Plan” might have given some of you a bit of trouble. 

Everyone has beliefs, fears, and anxieties that create problems. Moreover, these same negative thoughts can stop us from solving problems. We can do all the work to name the problem and decide we are willing to do better, but then a little voice chimes in and tells us why we can’t do better. You may have encountered that voice on Step Three.
You're wiser than you realize. // erikaoppenheimer.com // BLOG: Four Thoughts That Stop You from Making Changes... and What to Do About Them
This week, I’m following up with some insights into a few of the thoughts that may have impeded your progress in Step Three.

“I don’t have any ideas.”  

Feeling like you have no insights into a problem can be incredibly frustrating. Start by taking a breath (always a good idea), and then try asking yourself, “If I could do one thing about this issue, what might that one thing be?” Still nothing? Try walking away from that particular problem. An idea may spontaneously occur to you while you are doing something else. This also might be a good issue to bring up to a trusted friend or mentor, since everyone approaches a problem with a different perspective. Lastly, it’s possible that for now there actually isn’t much to be done that you aren’t already doing. So keep up the good work :) 


“I have too many ideas.”

Just like believing that you have no ideas can hold you back, so too can having fifty. Try picking the one-to-three idea(s) that you that you feel both motivated to try and  on which you can track your progress.


“I don’t know which idea will work.”

Of course you don’t! You haven’t tried them yet! When you treat life more like an experiment—or, better yet, a series of experiments—some of the pressure to know the “right” answer dissipates. As in the previous example, start with choosing one idea. Track what you do. Track the results. See how it goes.


“What I do doesn’t matter.”

I’m guessing everyone has had this thought at one time or another. But it’s rarely (if ever) true. Step away from your brainstorm and do something that results in an immediate, perceptible impact. This action does not need to relate to the source of your anxiety. Reach out to a friend—or, hey!, call your grandma—and ask how her day is going. Go for a run. Walk the dog. Clean your room. See what a difference ten minutes can make? Your actions matter. Now, go back to your brainstorm.

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The big idea here? Try something! Really. Just try it. Social anxiety? Try smiling as you walk down the hallways. Time anxiety? Try keeping a to-do list and a schedule. Remember: the idea doesn’t need to be complicated or revolutionary. It can be as simple as taking a breath. 

You’re wiser than you realize.

​
Somewhere inside you is an idea of one possible thing to be done. 

Choose it. And if that one thing doesn’t work, you will have gained insights that you can apply to future experiments.

​If you are interested in setting up a complimentary consultation for an SAT, ACT, or Mindset coaching package, be in touch.​
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  • About Erika
  • LinkedIn Profile
  • Coaching
    • Test Prep Coaching
    • Information for Parents
    • Schedule a Free Consultation
    • Testimonials
    • Expert Guidance for Tutors
  • Resources
    • Blog
    • Book
    • Free One Month SAT & ACT Prep Plans
    • Email Updates
  • Contact